


Oedipus Was a Wingman

by TheTruthBetween



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Humor, Mary is bisexual, incest themes but no actual incest, three humans and an angel walk into a bar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:34:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29970576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTruthBetween/pseuds/TheTruthBetween
Summary: Mary and the boys go out to a bar. They find out she's bisexual.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	Oedipus Was a Wingman

“I’m just saying, you should get out there,” Dean said, taking a pull from his beer.

Mary’s eyebrows rose. “And you care because…?”

Dean shrugged, looking to Sam for help, who returned the look with a patented ‘dude what are you talking about’ look. He sputtered for a second, before saying, “I don’t, not really. It’s just, y’know… people need people.”

“When the last time _you_ dated someone, Dean?” Mary challenged.

“I don’t date,” Dean answered automatically. “I mean, not for more than a night.”

Mary’s expression turned long-suffering.

“And hey, if that’s your thing, y’know, good for you, that’s cool. What’s your type?” Dean’s eyes scanned the bar. “Him?” he asked, pointing at an older man with a scruffy beard who would’ve looked like a hunter if he’d been wearing flannel instead of leather.

“ _Dude_ ,” Sam groaned. “You are _not_ trying to hook up _Mom_.”

“It’s called being a wingman, Sammy.”

Cas’s eyes bounced around the table, following the conversation with undisguised interest. He was the only one without a drink, under the guise of being the designated driver.

“He’s too… biker,” Mary judged, deciding to hell with it, her life was weird as fuck anyway, why not add her son playing one-night-matchmaker?

“Him?” Dean asked, pointing to another guy.

Mary looked horrified. “He’s a _child_!” she exclaimed when she looked at the 20-something smooth-faced boy.

Dean half-nodded in agreement and continued looking around. “Okay, what about him?”

Mary turned in her seat to look behind her at the indicated man. Beside him was a woman around Mary’s age with long brown hair and dark eyes. “ _Her_ ,” Mary stated firmly.

“What?” Sam asked, his voice overlapping Dean’s own, “Her?”

“Her,” Mary repeated.

Dean looked back and forth between Mary and the woman, and before his brain could properly engage, he blurted out, “That is so hot.”

Mary’s head whipped back around to stare at him, dumbfounded.

“Dude,” Sam muttered, shaking his head.

The sounds of the bar became louder as their table quieted, everyone staring at Dean in some combination of shock and confusion.

Finally Cas broke the silence, his voice knowing as he murmured, “Oedipus.”

Dean sputtered into his beer. “I’m not fuckin’ Oedipus, Cas!” he exclaimed in annoyance.

Sam snorted and, unable to help himself, joked, “No, that’d be Mom in this situation. You’d be fucking Jocasta.”

“ _Sam_ ,” Mary hissed.

Dean frowned. “Who’s Jocasta?”

“Oedipus’s mother.”

“Wh…” Dean squinted and shook his head slightly like he was in pain. “When did this turn into an Oedipus thing?”

“When you said that Mom and another woman is hot,” Sam answered wisely.

“I didn’t mean… I just… women, y’know?” Dean stuttered. “Women together is hot. This is not a Mom thing.”

Mary shook her head slowly with raised eyebrows and finished off her beer. “If you two are gonna keep talking about this, I’m going to…” she made a hand motion and stood up.

The three men watched her saunter over to the bar, and the brunette woman. She leaned against the bar with an inviting smile and the two began to talk. After a moment, the brunette turned pink and looked away, and Mary’s smile twisted to the side and she nodded. She returned to the table with a new beer and a shot of whiskey.

“No dice?” Dean asked.

Mary sighed and downed her shot. “The nice thing about modern times is how easy it is to ask a woman out. Unfortunately, that doesn’t mean there are any more women who will say _yes_ than there were in my day.”

“Next time, we go to a lesbian bar,” Dean stated with a nod. Then grinned as he pictured actually _being_ in a lesbian bar.

Sam shoved his shoulder. “Stop being gross.”

“Can’t help it, man. _Lesbians_.” Dean grinned.

“I can’t believe I gave birth to you,” Mary muttered.

Dean shrugged with a wide grin. “Well you’re stuck with me now.”

Grinning and huffing out a laugh, Mary propped her chin up on her hand. “I wouldn’t have it any other way. Even if you do occasionally say _incredibly_ inappropriate things about me.”

“I’m never gonna live that down.”

“Nope,” Sam and Mary said in unison.

After a moment, Cas asked, “Does this mean you _don’t_ want to sleep with your mother…?”

Dean dropped his head in his hand with a groan as Sam and Mary both started laughing.


End file.
